My Dreams

At night before I fall asleep I think about what the future may hold.  I think of Adam growing up, what sports he may play, what activities he may be into and then usually it ends with me almost in tears.  I know all children't futures are so uncertain but it feels like Adam's is even more so.  Will he have equipment and medicines to keep him alive that will hinder him physically from what his heart desires? Will we have to constantly find other things that he may love?  How can we keep him feeling positive and keep enjoying life instead of feeling like life sucks, is unfair and owes him?  He is such a fantasic kid, has an amazing personality, great imagination, is really happy and so far doesn't think that he needs to be spoiled so I guess I will take it all in strides.  I just need to remember that this little man can help me build cities for Mommy Monster and Adam Monster to knock down, buildings to drive cars through, race cars, feed stuffy's, watch movies, hide and seek and do awesome crafts.  I get to be a big kid all over again, doing the craziest things, singing in stores, saying silly things and being able to do it without looking like a complete fool.  Or at least I feel like I don't look like a complete fool hahaha. I'm sitting here looking at my boy eating ice cream, watching Sponge Bob and is super happy.  It fills my heart with joy.